Then I tried turning on my opera tapes to cheer myself up, but it turns out the Company had already got to them during my incarceration...they had all been replaced by Elle's horrible showtunes and Bob humming along in the background...speaking of which...why isn't he dead yet?? When it is implied that someone is going to die, I mean it! I might have to do it myself, since I can't trust anyone to follow through my instructions...how predictable...
So I set off to the music store to find some more classics...the owner guy was really creepy and bald and had a seedy-looking mustache of some sort...
"I'm looking for Le Nozze de Figaro, 1786"
"Uhh, sorry, we don't carry that anymore"
"Look, I'm kind of in a to-do here young man, I'm trying to change history and I need to come up with a plan that involves revenge, a virus, and world domi--peace ASAP and I can't take excuses right now! What DO you have?"
Turns out that was a total waste of time, I guess this decade sucks as far as musical tastes go. All the guy had were a bunch of tapes with a weird sort of grunting on them...whatever...I stabbed the guy with my javelin and turned to leave. I got shot trying to leave the store...they could have been friends of the owner dude, but they also could have been after my old (albeit ruined) opera tapes, and I wasn't going to let them off for that...so I killed them too and went home.
When I finally returned, I found Peter lying in a pool of blood...not his own blood, of course, I think it was elephant or chicken or some such. He was crying as per usual and it was quite disturbing. So I surprised him with a gift of brand new sock puppets to quiet him some and then got to thinking on what to do next...
3 comments:
Sock puppets! That reminds me of when I was in grade school and made an entire army of alien sock puppets...
Hmmm....shouldn't you be locked up?
They let me go because I have such a charming personality.
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